tv Late Night With Jimmy Fallon NBC November 3, 2009 12:35am-1:35am EST
and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cerand plause captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much, everybody. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." everybody, happy monday. everyone here have a good halloween? [ cheers and applause ] i love halloween. i just love halloween. it's the only time of the year you get to see a ghostbuster making out with sarah palin. it's really great. [ laughter ] halloween was crazy here in new york. in the village, i saw a guy with a pink mohawk and platform shoes wearing a scottish kilt. [ light laughter ] and he was just there to pick up
his costume. [ laughter ] that's an interesting -- even the obamas got into the halloween spirit. they handed out dried fruit to 2,000 trick or treaters. and just like that, they created 2,000 more republicans. [ laughter ] dried fruit? for real? i'm gonna egg the white house. this is insane. [ laughter ] and i never thought i'd do that. well, the new york city marathon was yesterday. and an american man won for the first time since 1982. [ cheers and applause ] pretty cool. meanwhile, a kenyan man won an eating contest. it was a weird day. the whole thing was just -- [ laughter ] the american who won the marathon was named meb keflezighi. [ light laughter ] that's the american who won. [ laughter ] meb keflezighi. sounds like i'm saying that name backwards, doesn't it? [ babbling ] meb keflezighi. keflezighi had already gotten an endorsement deal from scrabble. that's gonna be exciting. it's an immediate triple word
score, when you have keflezighi. [ laughter ] the white house predicted there would be 120 million doses of swine flu vaccines available today. but right now, there are only 26 million. yeah, they overshot by so much, they are all getting jobs as pilots for northwest airlines. [ audience groans ] [ light laughter ] the pentagon, the pentagon announced today, they have given the swine flu vaccines to every detainee at guantanamo bay. they detainees were like, "hey, whatever happened to closing this place?" [ laughter ] "i mean, i appreciate the vaccine, but this -- aren't you gonna close this place?" [ light laughter ] big international news, abdullah abdullah just quit next week's runoff election against afghanistan's president hamid karzi. abdullah abdullah said, he was just following in the footsteps of his role model, palin palin. [ laughter ] [ scattered applause ] it was a big weekend for sports fans. yesterday, for the first time all year, all four major sports were played. it also made the best day of the year for women to tell their
husbands really bad news. [ laughter ] "i crashed the car." "that's nice." "i slept with your best friend." "uh-huh." "i used to be a dude." "have fun." [ laughter ] you guys, four teenagers in utah were cited for disorderly conduct, after they rapped their order at a mcdonalds drive thru. they were only cited, because they started their rap with -- ♪ my name is kevin and i'm here to say ♪ [ laughter ] you can't do that. [ light laughter ] and finally, did you guys see this guy? at work, this guy was -- russian, he's driving the forklift. did you see this? he was driving a forkliftand look at what happens. watch this. this is real. "oops. oh, boy. [ audience groans ] whoa, boy, oh! [ laughter ] oh, woo! oh, my god! $150,000-worth of vodka is what he broke. [ audience groans ]
yeah, it was really bad. to get all the vodka off the floor, they had to hire david hasselhoff. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a reat show tonight. give it up for the roots! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, right. we got a great show tonight. i had a really busy weekend. i want to thank everyone at the university of rhode island. i was down there saturday night performing some stand-up comedy, me and steven wright. steven wright's a really funny guy. he's just so dry. [ light laughter ] it was really, really good. but the crazier night happened the night before. friday night, i was with the roots. >> questlove: you still gonna tell the story. >> jimmy: i gotta tell the story. you know i gotta tell this. [ laughter ] this is unbelievable. this is one of the most unbelievable nights of my life, every. so james, who plays the keys up there -- james, he was there, and they
didn't have a keyboard set up for james. we werplaying a gig at the borgata in atlantic city. i was, i went out and did stand-up for lik 20 minutes. and then, you guys came out and rocked the house. you were -- if you want to see the best band in the whole-wide world, go see the roots live. they're unbelievable. [ cheers and applause ] >> questlove: you saw the entire show? >> jimmy: i did not -- >> questlove: tell them the rest. >> jimmy: i did not see the entire show. >> questlove: tell them the rest. tell them the rest. >> jimmy: all right, here's what happened. here's what happened. so about three songs in -- >> questlove: you got bored. >> jimmy: no, i didn't get bored. [ laughter ] james was out there. james come in. he goes, he goes, "i don't know what to do, because they don't have a keyboard for me." i go, "let's go, let's go have a shot or something." [ light laughter ] so -- me and james -- yeah, what? water, yes. we drank a shot of water and our tour manager comes over. and she goes, "hey, you guys. stevie wonder is playing in the same venue --" at like the bigger venue in the hotel. and he's doing a meet and greet for, like 20 people. "do you ys want to meet stevie wonder?" so we go -- "yeah, of course." [ light laughter ] meet stevie wonder. so, james is like, "let me get my camera." okay, so you get your camera. we go down. we meet stevie wonder, and there's just not even 20 people. like, 12 people are talking to stevie. and we sat in the back. we didn't want to bother anybody.
we were just like, "this is amazing." and then, i got -- they gave me the microphone. they go, "say something to stevie wonder, please." i go, "okay." i go, "hi, stevie. my name is jimmy fallon." i'm a comedian. i host a late night talk show after "the tonight show." and i go, "we have the best house band in the world, the roots." and he goes, "oh, i know the roots." he goes, "they're great." i go, "yeah, well, james is here." he's shaking right now. he wants to say hi to you. and that, you know, he's probably you're biggest idol, right?" so, james says something. we're both stuttering. it's, so nervous. so he goes, "well, why don't you come up on stage, and have a picture with us?" so he's behind the keyboard. so i go up. and this is just weird, how this stuff happens. i go up to take a picture, and as a goof, as a joke, i go -- questlove's so mad at me. [ light laughter ] i go, i go -- ♪ we all know the people that people are the same where ever you go ♪ -- as a goof, right? and so, he starts playing the song. so i just go, "i can do you, too." i go -- [ as stevie wonder ] ♪ learn to live learn to give each other what we need is love ♪ he won't stop playing.
so now i can't stop singing. [ laughter ] we end up singing "ebony and ivory" and he starts harmonizing with me. [ laughter and applause ] and james ran over to play the piano. i'm singing "ebony and ivory" with stevie wonder! [ laughter ] and james is playing the piano next to stevie on the keyboard. and we go back and we're shaking. and we see, i missed the whole roots concert. [ laughter ] >> questlove: hello. excuse me? >> jimmy: and you come off the stage, we're like, "great show?" [ laughter ] and i'm smiling. >> questlove: yeah, y'all faked it. like, "oh, you guys rocked it!" meanwhile, y'all -- >> jimmy: we've got the biggest smiles on our face. like, "what are you guys smiling about?" >> questve: yeah, y'all came like -- "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah." [ laughter ] that's how they did it. >> jimmy: we just sang with stevie wonder. it was the most amazg -- anyws, go see the roots live. they're fantastic. [ laughter ] [ eers and applause ] well, we got a big show tonight, you guys. the lovely young singer and song writer, and this week's host on "saturday night live,"
taylor swift is here, swifty! [ cheers and applause ] i love here. also, from the new show "v," scott wolf is joining us. that's a good new show. [ cheers and applause ] aliens. from engadget.com, tech expert, josh topolsky's gonna show us the hot, new motorola droid phone. [ cheers and applause ] that'll be fun. and music from say anything. they're great. [ cheers and applause ] really good. big fan of theirs. it's gonna be great. it's gonna be a great show. a lot of big stories to talk about tonight. a lot of stuff going on in the world. let's see, there's a huge story here. this weekend, lauren conrad dressed up as a clown for halloween. [ light laughter ] a lot of buzz. a lot of buzz around that sory. what else is going on? the spice girls may perform at the 2012 summer olympics. [ light laughter ] yeah, that was a top story on yahoo news. [ light laughter ] and let's see what else. pete wentz got a tattoo of his friend's face, after losing a bet. [ light laughter ] big news, you all clearly care immensely about these stories.
i think it's time to give these stories their proper send off and put them up in the old, "who cares hindenburg." >> steve: and there e is the "who cares hindenburg" making her way across the beautiful skyline of lower manhattan. oh, no. oh, my god. oh, no! what a catastrophe! there goes the spice girls performance at the 2012 olympics. and oh! lauren conrad's clown costume has burst into flames! and pete wentz, what will become of pete wentz' news tattoo?! oh, the humanity! who cares?! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was a good voice over, higgins. there you have it. say good-bye to those stories forever. we'll be right back with more "late night." come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ (announcer) every woman has many sides express each one more with downy simple pleasures feel more calm
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. and thank you so much for watching. i appreciate it. you know, last week, we had a lot of halloween decorations on ouret. and we had spider webs and candy and jack-o'-lanterns and it was great. but this week, sadly they're all gone. we had to let them go. but what happens to a jack-o'-lanterafter halloween when it's glory has faded?
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our first guest tonight is currently headlining a giant, world tour. she recently released a big, expanded edition of her platinum-selling album, "fearless." and she's the host and musical guest on this week's "saturday night live." please welcome taylor swift, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you are very tall. [ cheers and applause ] you're gorgeous, very pretty. >> thank you. >> jimmy: very tall, too. how tall are you? >> i'm 5'11. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. [ cheers ] i lie to every body and say i'm 6'0. >> go tall people!. >> jimmy: yeah. [ cheers ] stand up, you are really -- i mean, gosh. it's intimidating. >> sort of a giant. >> jimmy: yeah, very tall. is everyone in your family tall?
>> yeah, my mom and dad are really tall. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> but i've actually -- and my brother's 6'2. >> jimmy: wow. >> and he's 17. so, it's like, i don't know. that's, like, the first comment that people make when they meet me now. i think i had a growth spurt or something. >> jimmy: yeah, i remember i used to drink coffee when i was a kid, and my mom's like, "if you keep drinking that, it's going to stunt your growth." >> oh. >> jimmy: well, i'm happy she told me. or else i'd be, like, 8'9" right now if i didn't -- [ laughter ] ended up at a pretty normal size, yeah. >> yeah, seriously. >> jimmy: yeah, i was pretty happy. >> yeah, that's exciting. >> jimmy: yeah. so, you grew up in pennsylvania. >> yes, on a christmas tree farm. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah, it's very festive, isn't it? >> jimmy: oh, my god. absolutely. yeah, you grow these trees and then you cut them down. [ laughter ] >> yeah, well, i was -- >> jimmy: like "the lonely pumpkin," yeah. we can make another movie next year. >> yeah, that'll be the sad story for next year. >> jimmy: but you grow them just for that reason. >> for cutting -- yeah, exactly. >> jimmy: for christmas. >> but, you know, but it's a happy thing. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, no, yeah, i'm, yeah. >> because they're all like, you know, it's in the center of living room. people are happy and smiling. it actually wasn't my job to cut them down, because i was, like, five. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. you just had to be cute and stand next to them and go, "that one." >> yeah, but they put me to work, though, yeah.
>> jimmy: they did, right? you had to work. >> definitely. they had -- there are these -- these bugs called praying mantises. >> jimmy: absolutely. >> that, they lay eggs and they form pods on the douglas fir christmas trees. their favorite tree to infest. >> jimmy: really? >> bet you didn't know that. >> jimmy: i did not know that. [ laughter ] so, when -- is that a bonus? like, if you buy the tree, like, you get a praying mantis larva. >> well, that's where i would come in. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, yeah? and you'd come in, you'd have to remove -- >> i would walk around the christmas trees all day and pick them off and put them in, like, a little basket. >> jimmy: aw. >> so, that -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "look at taylor, honey. isn't that cute, she's picking the praying mantis larva and putting it in the basket." >> "how sweet." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "how sweet," yeah. >> what an adorable little hobby for a child. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pretty -- yeah. then you moved -- you moved to nashville. >> i did. >> jimmy: when you were 14? >> yeah. i was 13, almost 14, when we moved. and it was because that's where country music is. >> jimmy: yeah, i love nashville. i think it's such a cool place. >> yes. >> jimmy: and you just said, "i want to be a country star. i want to be a country singer." >> it was sort of a step by step
process. i started out in children's theatre. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah. i was nine when i started doing that. >> jimmy: really? >> and that's when i started, like, i really fell in love with being on stage and entertaining people. but, at some point, it then kind of transformed into loving karaoke. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so -- >> jimmy: what's your karaoke song? >> it's "goodbye earl" by the dixie chicks. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, absolutely. yeah, that's a good one. i think mine is "russians" by sting. >> good for you. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] no one really chooses that one. so i don't have a problem -- [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: no one really fights over that one, yeah. they're like, "oh, go ahead and sing that. i'm not going to sing that one." i like that one a lot. ♪ in europe and america i don't know, that's it. >> nice. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's what i do. my new thing is i go up to legends and i just force them to sing duets with me.
>> i heard about that. >> jimmy: yeah, i've done it with stevie wonder so far. it worked for him, so -- [ laughter ] >> 100% of the time it's worked for you. >> jimmy: yeah, 100, yeah. one out of one times, yeah. that's a great percentage. but you're hosting "saturday night live." >> i know. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: are you freaking out? >> yes. >> jimmy: yeah, because today's the first -- today is monday, this is the day that it's just -- you don't know what's going to happen. >> i don't know what. >> jimmy: you didn't do any meetings or anything yet? >> no. >> jimmy: all right. >> i have a lot of questions for you, actually. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, this is -- it's going to be so good. you're going to be great. >> thanks for saying that. >> jimmy: because you're talented. yeah, i know. here's my advice, is, try everything. like, don't over think anything, don't be like, "yeah, this is similar to this one." or, "i kind of like this." just try it all. just go for it. >> okay. >> jimmy: try every single thing. be nice to the writers. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, i would bring them sandwiches and pizzas and stuff. whatever you can do to make the writers stay on your side. because it's all about the writing. and you're singing on the show, too, right? >> yes. >> jimmy: so, that's the good part. so then, say you don't like any of sketches. at least your music part, you go, "well, i'm going to be great at that." [ laughter ] right? am i helping you? >> that's a great tip. [ laughter ] thank you for that. >> jimmy: no, no, you're going to be great. it's going to be so good.
>> so, do you -- okay, i have my first meeting tonight. >> jimmy: okay, tonight's the pitch meeting. >> okay, what happens there? >> jimmy: so, you go into lorne's office. and you sit in a chair and all the writers come in. and they pitch you ideas, like, "i have an idea where you work in a ice cream shop with -- you're kate gosselin," or something like that. >> okay. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: hopefully they'll have better ideas. hopefully they're have better ideas. i -- these just come off the top of my head, everybody. i'm a professional comedian. awful. but that's exactly what you do. fake laugh. [ laughter ] you have to fake laugh, you have to do that. [ cheers and applause ] fake laugh at their ideas. go, "oh, ha-ha, that's funny." yeah. >> oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: it makes them feel good. it makes them feel good about themselves. just fake laugh and go, "oh, hey, that's a great idea." and then, when they leave, you go, "i'm not doing that kate gosselin ice cream bit. that's ridiculous." [ laughter ] but, to their face, just smile and go, "oh, that's good. yeah, yeah." and then you listen to all the pitch ideas. and then, are you -- did you bring ideas? >> yes, am i allowed to do that? >> jimmy: yes, absolutely, they love that. >> okay. >> jimmy: they usually don't take your ideas, but -- [ laughter and applause ]
-- you can bring them. that is, that is -- no. do you have -- do you do impressions? >> yes. >> jimmy: you do? this is going to be exciting. >> yes. >> jimmy: i'm excited to watch the show. this is going to be pretty good. >> i hope that i, you know, i am so excited. and i love to be prepared for everything, like, super annoying prepared. like, i have so many different things written down on, like, a memo. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> it's, like, really long. and i just -- i didn't want to be that girl that showed up and it was, like, "oh, well, you were supposed to supply it all." >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know? >> jimmy: no, well, this is -- this is definitely not that organized. >> okay. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're screwed. yeah, this is pretty much -- >> i was about to make flash cards and, like, a powerpoint. >> jimmy: no, you can't, you can't even -- in fact, they have everything on cue cards because they change the script last minute. >> okay. >> jimmy: so, they don't want you memorizing the script. so, don't worry if you're reading off the cue cards. like, we had christopher walken was great hosting "saturday night live," he's amazing. >> yes. >> jimmy: he wouldn't even look at the actor. he was acting with us, he'd be like, "i can't believe you're here." [ laughter and applause ] "i'm looking right at you. and we got to get out of here." and then you go across and his
eyes don't move. he goes, "good-bye." [ laughter and applause ] so that doesn't even matter. you'll have fun. >> that was amazing. >> jimmy: but no, stop, please. >> that was good. >> jimmy: no, i -- you have to top me. this is going to be your saturday, this is it. it's a dream for people to do it. >> yes. >> jimmy: and when it's over, you just want to do it again. it's that exciting. you're going to be great. >> i go to do -- i got to play angry orphan annie last time i was on. >> jimmy: i do remember this, it was awesome. >> thank you for saying that. >> jimmy: you had the red -- oh, i meant it. [ laughter ] i swear to god, i really did. >> that's good. >> jimmy: you were looking really cute. you had the red hair, red wig. and it was a -- all of the broadway actors that were out of work. >> yes. >> jimmy: yeah, i totally remember. it was great. >> you watched it. >> jimmy: absolutely. i'm a big fan of swifty. >> thank you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: does anyone call you swifty? >> yes, a lot more people now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i just gave you a nickname, but explain this quickly. "fearless" the platinum edition, now you have dvd on this guy. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you have photos. >> well, it's like, this album, "fearless," came out last year.
and i wanted to add six new songs to it. so, we added, like, six new songs, all this dvd content, all the music videos. and i wanted to name it "the hardcore ninja jedi version." >> jimmy: very good, yeah. [ laughter ] but you just went with platinum. >> but, you know, platinum, i guess, is more -- >> jimmy: that says it all, yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that says "hardcore ninja jedi version." >> it's shorter. >> jimmy: yeah, absolutely. you know what i like about you? you write or co-write all your own songs. that's pretty good. it's rare that people do that anymore today. >> well, thank you. >> jimmy: it's really cool. big fan. taylor swift is the host as well as musical guest on this week's "saturday night live." be sure to check it out. scott wolf joins us next. you'll be great, you'll be great, you'll be great. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ friends, family, work email, personal email. friends, family, messes, updates and feeds. everything. out of my way, freak. constantly updated and streamed together in one place. so you can keep track of whatever you want and focus on what matters most.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody, and thank you for watching. you know our next guest from his six years as bailey on the hugely-popular show, "party of five." starting tomorrow, you can see him in his new series, "v," on abc. say hello to scott wolf, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: good to see you, buddy. thank you for coming out. >> thank you for having me. >> jimmy: oh, please. do you still get a lot of "party of five," bailey -- people calling you bailey?
>> yes. yeah. all the time. a lot of "bailey" in airports. a lot of people saying, "my dog's named bailey. my baby's named bailey," which is -- it's, you know, you want your characters that you play to mean something to an audience, hopefully. >> jimmy: yeah. >> but it'll probably be nice to hear, like, "oh, my gosh, that dude from 'v'." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that'll be a different thing, yeah. >> hopefully get some update. >> jimmy: i'm excited about "v." >> it's exciting. i mean -- >> jimmy: is it -- because i got to see, like, a clip of the pilot. >> yeah. >> jimmy: are they lizard people? >> they might be lizard people. >> jimmy: they might be lizard people. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: because, i mean, you guys remember "v" from the '80s? [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: it was a huge thing. >> a phenomenon. and a huge event. i mean, i remember being a kid. there weren't a ton of, like, events when we were kids watching tv. >> jimmy: yeah. >> but i begged my parents to stay up and watch it. but -- >> jimmy: yeah, "v" was big, it was big. well, i saw you at comicon. >> yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. it was intense. they screened the show for 4,000 people at comicon. >> jimmy: and you're not -- you're not guaranteed. sometimes, people don't show up for those things. >> yeah, yeah, they opened up these huge ballrooms because they, you know, they were hoping, obviously, there would be people interested in seeing it. so, they opened up the ballroom bigger than they ever had
before. room for 4,000 people. and thank god people showed up and filled it up. and it was intense. >> jimmy: yeah. >> because, i mean, you never get to see a television show you work on with 4,000 people. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i mean, it was -- >> jimmy: we try to screen ours every night for 4,000 people. [ laughter ] >> how does that go? >> jimmy: no one shows up. no, no one shows up. very -- swifty already left. >> she's out. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: she went upstairs to work on "saturday night live." yeah, she went upstairs, yeah. it's ridiculous. hey, congratulations, since, of course, "party of five," you got married. >> i did get married. >> jimmy: to kelly, who everyone, i don't know everyone knows, from "the real world." >> she was on "the real world," there she is. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: gorgeous. [ cheers and applause ] >> my god, isn't she lovely? >> jimmy: beautiful. >> i have to -- every time i have this conversation, i preface it by saying she was on "the real world" before it became inappropriate to not have a threesome in a hot tub on the first night. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: now it seems like it's every year. >> it's like, you have to do it. it's in your contract. >> jimmy: first night. and then somebody has to get into a fistfight. the first night. >> you need to get more drunk than you can possibly stand up. >> jimmy: my god. it's obscene. i still watch it. >> it's fun. >> jimmy: it makes me feel old,
but i still watch it. i love "the real world." and now they have "real world/road rules ruins." lot of words with "r." "r" words. if you can't say "r," you'll have a tough time at my house. "real world/road rules ruins." >> but it's funny, because we watch, you know -- i know, as an actor, you're supposed to hate reality television because, you know. but some of it's really fun. we watch it, and she'll be like, "oh, man." and i'm like, "what?" and she's like, "oh, they totally built that whole moment." and she has this really funny story that, when she was on the show, she was in the kitchen, like, making a ham sandwich one time. and one of the other guys on the show came in and he started, like, making a smoothie. and then, when they, like, cut the show together, they put, like, rage against the machine under it. and they, like, cut back and forth between their faces, it was like -- ♪ won't do what you tell me ♪ [ laughter ] and they created a scene where it looked like they wanted to kill each other and they were basically making brunch. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: just making a ham sandwich. >> just having something to eat. >> jimmy: that's insane. but i'm so excited about this "v" thing. people are freaking out. we have a clip of the original "v." >> oh, good. >> jimmy: because it's a legendary -- but it -- i don't know if it really holds up anymore. here's a clip from the original
"v" from the '80s. >> well, i don't think our leader could have possibly chosen anyone who could do a better job than you. [ rats squealing ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> amazing. >> jimmy: like, rubberized. >> and that was actually shot before there were special effects. they just stretched her face like that. >> jimmy: they did not. [ laughter ] they did not. >> that's terrible. >> jimmy: do we have that again? just show that in slow motion. can we do that? [ laughter ] there you go. [ laughter ] it almost looks like it's someone else's hand, even. like, this third hand coming in. >> stunt hand. >> jimmy: yeah. but in this new "v," which the effects i saw of this ship were amazing. >> incredible. >> jimmy: i mean, so they're invading all these cities. >> yeah, 29 gigantic --
>> jimmy: 29. >> -- like, two mile-wide ships descend upon the major cities of the world. >> jimmy: to take over, world domination. >> well, they say they're here in peace. that's the cool kind of vibe about the show. is, a lot of times, you know, when we imagine alien arrivals, it's, like, buildings blowing up and little green men trying to kill us. in this one, they look human and they're really beautiful and they say, "we're actually here in peace and we want to help you live better lives and cure diseases." and all these amazing things. but pretty quickly it becomes clear that they might actually have a much more sort of -- >> jimmy: agenda. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: and you play a newscaster -- [ laughter ] >> that was creepy. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] that was good, see? you play a newscaster. and they choose you to speak through. >> that's right. i play a guy named chad decker. >> jimmy: that's a great newscaster name. >> yes. >> jimmy: "hi, i'm chad decker." >> "chad decker." >> jimmy: "chad decker here with the news." >> and i get great, like, chad decker newsguy hair. which is sort of, like -- and it's great. he's, like, a really conflicted -- you know, i don't have, like, an evil, bad guy face. so, i don't get cast a bunch as the evil, bad guy.
but -- >> jimmy: you have a very cheery, smiley face. >> it's sort of a smiley, warm face. >> jimmy: yeah, absolutely. >> thank you. >> jimmy: yeah, i love your face. [ laughter ] is that weird? i should've said that to taylor swift, right? [ laughter ] >> it made me feel really good. that felt really, really nice, yeah. >> jimmy: it was genuine. >> but, so, yes, so chad is a morally conflicted guy. he's super-ambitious. he gets the opportunity of a lifetime when the leader of the visitors pick him to do their first world-wide live interview, where the aliens are basically going to announce to humanity what their plans are. >> jimmy: what a break. >> it's a huge break. >> jimmy: what a break for a reporter, right? >> a big break. >> jimmy: "they aliens chose me to be the guy, this is awesome." >> it's -- but he's, like, a guy who might want to be in the spotlight so badly that he actually -- >> jimmy: will do anything. >> will do anything. makes compromises that might hurt a lot of people. >> jimmy: we have a clip from your show. do you want to set it up? >> sure, i mean, i sort of just did. >> jimmy: okay. >> yes. that was kind of the -- [ laughter ] yes. one of the pre-setups.
>> jimmy: yeah, that was great. you're a great actor. i thought you were just actually having a conversation with me. [ laughter and applause ] you're setting up the clip! >> that's why i get paid the medium bucks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: here's a clip from the new "v" on abc. >> thanks again for choosing me to do this. i'm really excited. >> so are we. >> do you have any questions before we go to air? >> no, just be sure not to ask anything that would paint us in a negative light. >> excuse me? >> don't ask any questions that would portray us negatively. ask ones like you did when we first met. >> oh, i think there's a mistake. i'm a journalist. it's my job to ask questions, even if they make the other person uncomfortable. >> that was not my understanding. >> standing by to go to air. >> i'm afraid i don't have a choice. >> this interview is now cancelled. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, there you go. "v" premiers tuesday at 8:00 p.m. on abc. scott wolf, everybody! we'll be right back with joshua topolsky, come on back.
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>> jimmy: josh! >> yeah. >> jimmy: what have you got for this time? >> well, it's a very busy time of the year, you know. november, holidays are descending upon us -- the black cloud. no, that's halloween. so there's a bunch of new stuff. >> jimmy: holidays don't descend on us like that. >> yeah, they do. it is a loving descendance -- >> jimmy: yeah, a loving descend -- >> descension, that's not even a word. [ laughter ] so any how, it's november, right? everybody will be gearing up for christmas and hanukkah and kwanzaa and all the gift giving holidays. and when electronics manufacturers hear about this, they go crazy. it's like, you know, an all-you-can-eat buffet. >> jimmy: yeah. >> but in reverse. does that make sense? >> jimmy: no. >> no. [ laughter ] there's a bunch of new -- par for the course. there's a bunch of new phones that are out, that are coming out. aren't out yet. >> jimmy: yes, yes. >> and you're a phone guy. >> jimmy: i freak out. >> you love the phone. >> jimmy: i have the iphone. that's what i use now. >> yeah. >> and i just -- and at&t, i just lose reception -- >> drop call? >> jimmy: it doesn't work as a phone, but everything else is a great. [ laughter ]
>> i mean, you don't really need a phone if you are an iphone, do you? i mean, you get apps. >> jimmy: well, it's like, e-mails are great and twitter. and you do apps and there's games, and it's -- >> no, i'm the same way. >> jimmy: but the phone is just -- >> i can't even talk on it. so -- >> jimmy: no. >> so, no. so, verizon actually -- is on this wavelength. they've got an anti-iphone. they have a new device. >> jimmy: the droid. >> the droid, yeah. hang on. we have it. all right so -- >> jimmy: i'm excited. that's it? >> so the droid is -- they have, let me get down here. hello, no, that's not working. this is they're kind of anti-iphone that they've created. it runs on google's operating system. it's called android. >> jimmy: android, yeah. >> and they've done -- they're really are going after apple and at&t on this. they're doing ads that are making fun of stuff that the iphone doesn't do and making fun of at&t's network. and rightfully so. at&t's network is not awesome. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it has holes. it has flaws. >> and they've done these, kind of, attack ads on all the things that the iphone doesn't do. these, like, these, idon't ads. >> jimmy: yeah, i have the, yeah -- >> you have it here, yeah. >> jimmy: idon't customize,
idon't something. >> and it's all stuff that's, like -- if you're, like, a regular phone buyer. "i don't allow open development." i mean, that's cool for nerds. but is there anybody here who's been like, "oh, i wish this allowed open development!" [ laughter ] "this phone, it's so good. i love super monkey ball, but i don't -- i just need to have some open development on this thing." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what i saw, too, on the bottom, it says -- there's a trademark -- droid is a trademark of lucas arts. >> yeah. they had to license the name droid from lucas films. >> jimmy: george lucas owns the word "droid." >> he invented it for "star wars." and now it's -- >> jimmy: i can invent a word. >> and now it's a verizon phone. >> jimmy: clorgen. [ laughter ] if anybody uses the word clorgen, i get, like, 10 bucks. >> that's gonna really hurt my clorgen device, you know? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: motorola says clorgen. everyone's gonna get it. owned by the fallon -- >> but that doesn't have the same ring as droid. >> jimmy: it doesn't right? >> no, not really. >> jimmy: clorgen, isn't this good? clorgen sounds swedish. >> yeah, i mean, if it were a piece of furniture, you might be on it. [ laughter ] like a couch, the clorgen.
all right, so what else does this guy do? >> so the big, actually, the crazy thing about this is that the day they announced it, they also announced they were doing navigation. so google is getting into the gps stuff. >> jimmy: oh, i heard about this. this is a big thing. >> yeah, so check it out it's like, google maps, but then you can go, see if we can get this. and it will jump into -- there we go. it spins down into, like, a gps mode. and when they announced this, the stock of garmin and tomtom, the companies make gps units. they dropped, like, 40%, like plummeted. because it's free, and they're gonna make it, for anything that does google maps, they're gonna try to put this on it. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh! >> which is kind of crazy. >> jimmy: that's amazing. and now, how do you type on it? >> oh, it's got a keyboard. that's the other thing, right. [ audience ohs ] it's got an actual keyboard. >> jimmy: hey, hey, hey! [ laughter ] [ applause ] that's awesome. >> check this out. check this out. it's actually not -- i have an iphone here, and it is not that much thicker. it's got a keyboard. can you get that? i mean, it's almost as thin and it's got a full keyboard which makes typing, obviously, if you don't like the -- >> jimmy: how is the -- have you played with it? >> yeah. >> jimmy: and what do you think? >> i did a 4,000-word review. i can't believe you haven't read it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm only up to the third word. >> well.
that's probably as far as you want to go. >> jimmy: and what's this guy? what is that saying? >> that's -- it's a four-way rocker. it's actually five-way, because it has a button. this is nerdy. that is nerdiest thing i've heard. >> jimmy: no, i just told scott wolf i thought his -- i liked his face. [ laughter ] you can do no wrong. >> it's a pretty good thing. if you like a face, you couldn't do -- >> jimmy: dude, the other thing i wanted you to show us is the, you have an hd2? is that -- >> no, the twitter. oh, the twitter peak. oh, man, yeah. because i have a pile of device over here. so, this is wild. this is a company called peek and they make just e-mail devices. all they do is they look like this. but they just do e-mail. and they've partnered with twitter, and this just does twitter. all it does is send twitter message, tweets, and gets tweets back. [ light laughter ] and it's -- i know, right. >> jimmy: that's it? >> that's all it does. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so it's a tweeting machine? >> it tweets. >> jimmy: and receives
>> and receives tweets and it also receives direct messages on twitter. >> jimmy: wow! [ light laughter ] >> yeah, those are personal tweets. so this has, actually, has not been announced yet. you are basically breaking it here. this is your news. >> jimmy: so i'm going to shatter the technology department. >> yeah i mean -- if you have an iphone today, no, i'm confused about -- i don't know what -- i mean, there are tweeting applications for iphones -- so this is not for me. but, i mean, i don't know. there's a person out there who just has a phone. and they want to twitter device -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: a dedicated twitter device. >> they want just to simplify their life by having multiple devices in their pocket. at all times. do you want to send a tweet from it? >> jimmy: the twitter peek, everybody. >> but, yeah, it is going to be $100 for six months and $200 lifetime. you don't have to pay any for all the latest tech news, check out his website, engadget.com. we'll be back with the performance of say anything. there they are. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] warm pillsbury cookies
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right. welcome back, everybody. our next guests are about to release their self-titled third album tomorrow. and they're here tonight to debut it's first single "hate everyone." please welcome say anything! ♪ >> did you know that there are people in the world annoyed by all the other people in the world? and of all these angry people of the world, i am the angriest
boy! ♪ ♪ when i was spat onto the earth in a stream of guts ♪ ♪ by mother nature that green-eyed slut i wasn't the first to get ♪ ♪ forced from her cut one to whom i still shall stay stuck ♪ ♪ staring from the cradle my eyes take in the baby speak of my ♪ ♪ brain-dead kin the goo-goo goggles reflecting the grin of a chub-faced alien ♪ ♪ well if you think i'm being harsh well baby keep on counting stars ♪ ♪ 'cause i hate everyone i hate everyone i hate everyone upon this cursed earth ♪ ♪ then i grew a few hairs where the sun don't shine packed me in a classroom ♪ ♪ to count the time studying the history of men's minds ♪ ♪ chasing tail and
committing hate crimes recipe girl with ♪ ♪ the gas-guzzlers forced myself to fall in love with her ♪ ♪ she was so strung out she swear it never occurred the honky king went back on his word ♪ ♪ the next one did the same the blind leading the lame all together now ♪ ♪ i hate everyone i hate everyone i hate everyone upon this cursed earth ♪ ♪ how does it make you feel to be wanted whoa how does it make you feel to be one of many ♪ ♪ how does it make you feel to be blinded whoa how does it make you feel how does it make you feel ♪ ♪ i hate actors who seem gen